AmyJane
@ChrisLong It opens here tomorrow. We're going on Sunday.
| AmyJane Building sand castles with the boy: "What do you want me to build?" Jonas: "How about the Millennium Falcon?" |
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| AmyJane "Look at that fanny pack." "I think that's his gut." "No! It's a tan fanny pack." "Is not." "Jiminy." |
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| AmyJane John has been on a tech support call with his mother for well over an hour. Unrelated: I should probably go out for more beer. |
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| AmyJane I need to pack for the shore. Which means I need a few drinks. Which means we'll find some interesting shit in our luggage tomorrow. |
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| AmyJane Jonas just spilled a bowl of granola. Me, pissy: "Now I have to vacuum AGAIN." Jonas, softly, Nelson Muntz style: "Ha-ha." |
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| AmyJane Jonas just told my sister to "grow a pair". We're going to be in trouble when he starts school, aren't we? |
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| AmyJane @blankbaby John has always had an unnatural hatred of Larry Mendte. He is so happy that he turned out to be a creep. But it is Marc Howard. |
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| AmyJane @w1bp It actually was not Larry Mendte, weirdo email peeper. It was Marc Howard. |
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| AmyJane 2 weeks in a row, I saw a local newscaster at the grocery store, both times buying HUGE packs of toilet paper. Make of that what you will. |
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| AmyJane I feel like going out and getting into an altercation just to tell someone to "Eat a dick". |
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| AmyJane Best apology ever, from Ice-T: "I apologize, Soulja Boy, for telling you to eat a dick." Seriously, you guys, I think he really means it. |
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| AmyJane @brentsimmons Try making an ass out of my husband. That's the leaderboard material. |
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| AmyJane Sipping whisky. I'm not sure I like whisky. I'm either broadening my palate or I'm an alcoholic. |
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| AmyJane @kerri9494 Doughnut, no question about it. |
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| AmyJane Also, I tried it, but I prefer "moustache" to "mustache". And I don't give a shit what the American Mustache Institute has to say about it. |
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| AmyJane Just when I was going to ask the girl at Lush if I was supposed to ignore the mustache drawn on her face, she asked, "Hey, do you Twitter?" |
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| AmyJane I've lost my faith in humanity. The bookstore has a "Vampires" section. |
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| AmyJane Things that are always funny: rashes, hobos, and falling down the stairs. If I ever saw an itchy hobo take a fall, I'd probably shit myself. |
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| AmyJane 3 Twitterers in the house. We're jumpy, paranoid; waiting for the others to do something stupid. As a side note: I really miss law school. |
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